Tantrums in children usually start appearing between 18 months and two years. This phase is commonly called “The Terrible Twos”. Most parents fear it and here is a short explanation about why children face this kind of behaviour and how you can handle these difficult moments.

Why?

 The terrible twos are a common phenomenon that appears because children, at 18 months or thereabouts, become more aware of the world around them. Like all human beings, your child too wants to be in control. But they lack the communication skills to tell you what they want as they haven’t started talking yet. This leads to frustration, which leads to tantrums.

There are different causes for your child to throw a tantrum:

• A physiological need hasn’t been fulfilled (hunger, thirst or sleep)
• They can’t do as much as they wish. Their physical prowess doesn’t keep pace with their curiosity to discover the world.
• They don’t understand time and patience. If they want something, it has to be now.
• They consider themselves to be the centre of the universe so sharing or thinking about other’s needs isn’t in their scope of thinking.

Why with mum or dad only?

 With you, your little one knows that he/she can be fully himself because you love him unconditionally. This figure of trust is extremely important to their development but it also means you will have to face most of the short-temper moments.

 How to handle a crisis:

 You know your child best. Try and identify what is causing the frustration of the moment.

• Your child might need to sleep, eat or drink. 
• Laughter is your best partner and making your child giggle is a great option to find your way out of a tantrum. Distracting the child will help him/her to focus on something different and forget the issue that was causing the tantrum.
• Children thrive on daily routine and any change can create tantrums. So try to stick to a routine as early as possible.
• Ignore him or her. Your child might believe that being louder will lead him to get what he wants. It is sometimes correct to ignore the tantrum as this is not acceptable behaviour and therefore does not need to be acknowledged.
• If you pander to them then they will continue to take advantage of you. Remember, this is not because your child is naughty. It is because your child as yet to understand right from wrong, and will do anything in their power to get what they want.
• Leave the room. This is your last option but it shows that there is no point in getting angry and you will be modelling a calm behaviour.