It seems as if every child has some strange nervous habit: thumb-sucking, nail-biting, or even hair twirling. Though they look harmless, it’s important to break such undesirable habits before they become part of your child’s personality for good.

So why live with the habit when you can break it? Here are tips for dealing with your child’s nervous quirk:

First, ask yourself: “Is this habit a problem?”

Before anything, you need to first check whether your child’s habit is as troublesome as you think it is. Most of the times, strange mannerisms die out as the child grows. “These habits can develop very early in childhood and frequently resolve without a specific intervention,” says psychiatrist Ivan Walks, MD.

Intervening too much too soon can end up backfiring, instead of fixing the problem – a harmless stress-reliever can be replaced by something worse. Ask yourself: is this habit negatively affecting my child or not? If the answer is yes, then you may move to the next phase.

See what triggers the quirk – and remove it

This is phase two: check what causes a nervous habit in your child. Are they angry, bored, or anxious when they do it? Identifying the trigger makes it easy to solve the habit – by either removing the trigger physically or taking your child away from that triggering circumstance.

You should act cautiously in both cases; spend a few days analysing your child’s behaviour, slowly adjusting his or her environment according to their nature. Anything too abrupt or too intrusive will only push your child from the frying pan into the fire.

Motivate your toddler

“If a child has a clear reason, interest or motivation, they’ll make a change,” says Elaine Taylor-Klaus, co-founder of ImpactADHD, the first virtual coaching and training resources designed specifically for parents of children with ADHD.

Discuss with your child why it’s better to lose the habit instead of keeping them in the dark about it. Keeping rewards as an end goal adds incentive and interest in the process, allowing children to get motivated to pull themselves out of their own nervous habits.

Replace the quirk as soon as you can

As soon as you see your child slowly move away from their habit, pick a harmless alternative. Teach your son to squeeze his thumb if he has a habit of sucking it, or make your daughter put her tongue between her teeth if she has a habit of grinding them. Be as creative as you want – but make sure they practice as much as possible.

Remember to drill, drill, drill; make these alternatives second-nature for them, and always give gentle reminders along the way.

Strange habits are normal for every child to experience. However, a quirk doesn’t remain a simple quirk if it starts to negatively affect a child’s daily functioning.

Therefore, instead of running the risk of an innocent habit turning into an undesirable trait, a parent should work on correcting the habit in a patient, healthy way.